I, Heather C, hereby commit to living the highest possible form of the High Life in any and all situations. I pledge never to willingly participate in non-High Life-like activities, including but not limited to: male bathing suit shopping, goatee dying, embroidered golf shirt collar popping, wallet-mirror carrying, denim pant leg rolling, unnecessary nail manicuring, or pet portrait painting. Most importantly, I will uphold my sense of common sense and use it authoritatively when called for to maintain my responsibility to unashamedly, undeniably, and unabashedly live the High Life.
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